The United States of America was found dead on election night in a motel outside Reno, NV following the victory of Mr. B'rack Pampers in the Presidential election. Forensic pathologists have ruled the death a suicide by voting.
"We found an inordinate number of ballots and hanging chads in the motel room where America was holed up on election day," reported medical examiner Crispy Pennyfart. "At first we thought it was a lethal mixture of hope and change, but it was the chads."
"Americans are just plain stupid," said Lady Liberty in an SNN exclusive interview. "We let in the huddled masses, we tell them to be responsible, and then they drink and vote and this is what happens."
The United States was laid to rest at Arlington National Cemetary today. No word on who will be replacing the USA. Our sources are saying that it may well be the Pampers Empire, or the Banana Republic of Waffles.
Rest assured that SNN will make up the details as they happen.